Stay Humble

I was 12, playing video games with my best friend when he turned and asked, “How’d your game go today?”

Without thinking, I said "I threw a shutout and hit two home runs."

He nodded and smirked. Within seconds, my father called me out of the room.

We stood in the kitchen. He told me he never wanted to hear me respond that way again.

"You tell them how the team did. Win or lose. Or at most, that you played well. Nothing more, unless they really want to know. Even then, stay humble."

Then he said something I've never forgotten:

"Nobody wants to hear a response like that. Don't talk about yourself, keep it about the team."

That conversation changed me. Ever since that day, you'd have to pry the stats out of me. I kept it simple and moved on.

My father was right: If you're good, they'll know it.

I bet your own kid knows who the smartest student in their class is without anyone telling them. Same thing in baseball. Same thing in any sport.

If you have to tell people? You probably aren't as good as you think.

There's an old saying: "Act like you've been there." Don't celebrate like it's your first time. Carry yourself like someone who expects to succeed.

Success is easy when everything's going your way. But success is a test. It tests whether people will root for you or against you.

There's a massive difference between conceited and confident.

Confident is quiet. It's the kid who goes 3-for-4 and says "I saw the ball well today" and moves on. It's the player everyone wants to be around.

Conceited is loud. It's the kid who makes sure everyone knows about his stats. It's the player everyone's secretly waiting to see fail.

Here's what nobody tells you about success: it reveals who you really are.

Failure is easy to handle because everyone rallies around you, and you know you need to work harder.

But success? Success makes you think you've arrived. That you're different. That you don't need to grind like everyone else.

The best players I ever played with knew this better than everyone.

They stayed hungry when things were going right. They got a taste of it and wanted more. They worked harder.

As Ryan Westmoreland says “Talent gets you noticed, but character keeps you there.”

Every time someone asks "How'd you do?" You choose how you want to respond.

You can make it about you. Or you can make it about the team.

My father taught me that lesson in my kitchen when I was 12, and it stayed with me, even beyond baseball.

If you're good, people know. If you have to tell them? You're not as good as you think.

The choice is yours: Do you want to be the player everyone roots for or the one everyone's secretly waiting to see fail?

Handle success like you handle failure. With humility, with your teammates in mind, and with the understanding that this game is bigger than you.

Team first. Always.

For parents and coaches: Pay attention to how your player talks about their success. Are they giving credit to teammates? Staying humble? Or making everything about themselves?

It's our responsibility to correct this and guide them in the right direction. They are kids and don't know any better.

The time to course-correct isn't when they're struggling. It's when they're succeeding. That's when character is really being built.

If your kid is on a hot streak and starting to change how they carry themselves, have that kitchen conversation. When the cold streak comes (and it will), they'll want teammates who have their back.

Help them understand what my father taught me: if you're good, people will notice. The question is whether they'll be rooting for you or against you.

Help me keep more kids in the game. If you found this helpful, please forward it to another parent or coach.

Thanks for being here. See you next week Inside the Dugout.

-Coach Steve-

Steve Holmes
Founder, Inside the Dugout
2006 MLB Draft | All-American | Youth Coach | Dad